I don’t even know where to begin. It’s odd to think that the bar exam has been over for a little over two weeks now. I think I’m finally starting to adjust to normalcy again although it still feels weird not to wake up and immediately sulk to my “study prison.” A lot has happened over the course of two months emotionally and spiritually. I’ve started to make some small changes in my life, and you know what? For the first time in a long, long time I feel like I’m on the right path.
Like a lot of other people in my graduating law school class, I’ve officially embarked on the job search. A few people have asked me how the market looks, and honestly, I don’t think it’s as bad as it was several years ago. However, it is so, so important to get as much experience as possible in law school or any curriculum for that matter. I keep telling my underclassmen friends that they need to do whatever is possible to get legal experience, do it early, and stay with it from that point on. I didn’t realize how valuable my motion practice and mediation experiences were until I started to interview at law firms and legal organizations these past few months. I can thank the CTA for that. My CTA internship seems to be my shining glory, and I’m blessed in that I absolutely loved that internship. The other attorneys I worked with were incredible, smart, down to earth and friendly. I’d go back in a heart beat (trust me in that I’ve been keeping an eye on the CTA since I left). In the meantime, I’ve gone back to volunteering at the courthouse helping people file for adult guardianships over loved ones who are unable to take care of themselves physically, financially and emotionally. The clientele that comes through the Help Desk varies widely, but many are indigent or have very little income. I love working here. I love helping people–I always have. I hope that my legal career allows me to give back as much as my heart wants. It took a long time for me to find what I love, and I definitely found it with the law. I’m able to combine my love of writing, love of helping people, and my love of daily professional challenges into one sweet package. I could care less about the amount of money I make. What I’d accept as a salary would probably baffle people, haha. I realize that I’m still climbing the ladder, but I’m here for a reason, and I’m at peace. I have no idea how long it will take for me to land a job, but worrying does nothing, and I have faith that it will come in time.
Aside from post-grad life I have a few trips that are beckoning me. My first definitive stop is to see one of my best friends in Texas. It’s been awhile since we’ve had a chance to hold a deep and meaningful conversation, and I’m so looking forward to it. We met in college, and we’ve pretty much been inseparable since (even though we are states apart now—to be able to pick up no matter what is a beautiful thing). I’m also dying to visit my “step-sister” and her husband in Sweden. I call her my step-sister because she (and her two brothers) were an ENORMOUS part of mine and my brother’s life when we were younger. She is basically the sister I never had. My heart aches because I miss them so much. Those memories are beautiful. I’m also definitely planning a trip to Florida to visit my family and friends, including another best friend who has loved me unconditionally since middle school. That’s a long time to love me, folks, haha. I hope this trip happens sometime in the near future.
It’ll be interesting to see what these next few years bring. Starting a new family perhaps? Dan has been entertaining the idea of graduate school. I find it funny that we might possibly flip-flop. We’ve even discussed how possibly moving to another state might be in the cards. I love Chicago, but I have always said that I don’t want to be tied down to one area. It would be hard to give up such an amazing city and wonderful friends, but God has a bigger plan for me, and if that time comes I’ll embrace it with open arms.
I’ve decided to get rid of my music and memory spot-light posts and replace them with a series called, “growing in faith.” I wasn’t really keeping up with the music and memory posts anyway. My blog details my life, and I thought it would be fitting to share my journey with those who want to read it. I haven’t quite decided how I’m going to write these posts but I’m thinking I will share the struggles that I’m facing while pursuing my faith in hopes that it will give someone else hope. I think C.S. Lewis said it best, “I didn’t go to religion to make me happy. I always knew a bottle of Port would do that. If you want a religion to make you feel really comfortable, I certainly don’t recommend Christianity.” What I take from this quote is that following your faith, whatever it may be (mine is Christianity), is not easy. I know there will be stumbling blocks, but these are lessons in disguise. I know there will be times when I’m questioned beyond my capacity to argue, and I know there will be times where I am just flat out struggling. For now, I’m working on myself, putting up boundaries that feel right for me, and slowly growing in the Lord. Stay tuned!